by Lady Green
From Issue 3.1 - September/October 1996
Seems I've been doing an awful lot of demystifying lately: analyzing
the undercurrents that run beneath the "power exchange," revealing the
insecurities that lie underneath the facade of dominance (and the
strength that lies underneath the facade of submission), and generally
destroying everybody's cherished illusions.
Well, it's time for a
confession. None of that was true. I'm really a heartless, cold,
domineering bitch. All dominants are heartless, cold, domineering
bitches (or bastards, as the case may be). Furthermore, all
submissives are spineless, cowering wimps.
And what's more:
- I am
entitled to be a dominant because I am always in complete, perfect
control of my own life. If that control ever wavers, if I ever prove
less than perfect, I will immediately recognize my true submissive
nature and start hunting for a perfect master who will take over and
run things properly.
My dominant nature is so profound and pure
that people should be glad to serve me. If anybody -- for example,
PG&E, the cable company, or my dentist -- fails to perceive their debt
to me, and is foolish enough to think that I owe them something, that
is merely their own blindness. Fortunately, there are always others
who will compensate for such idiocy by paying for me themselves. And
so they should: dominance as perfect as mine deserves tribute. (I also
think it's very perceptive of Liz, Kiki, Meredith, and the rest of the
folks at Cuir Underground to go to all the trouble of publishing a
whole newspaper simply to give me a forum for my opinions.)
Dominants are better than submissives. This is obvious. If we weren't
better, we wouldn't be able to be dominants. Furthermore, women are
better than men, bisexuals are better than monosexuals, and heavy
players are better than light players.
I have never experienced a
moment's hesitation, guilt, concern or fear as I exert my dominant
nature. It is inconceivable to me that I should ever have such
feelings, for if I did, that would be a sign that I was not a true
dominant. Moreover, I know that anybody who fails to serve me in any
way I see fit, and who is not willing to accept any form of suffering
at my hands or at the hands of anyone I choose, is not a true
submissive and is unworthy of my time and skill.
Courtesy is for
submissives (and, I suppose, for vanilla folk). My dominant nature
entitles me to behave as I please. If I condescend to be rude to you,
you should feel honored: at least you have had the good fortune to
receive my attention at all.
My submissives' needs are of no
concern to me. They are there for one purpose only: to make my life
easier and more pleasant. The privilege of lurching out of bed during
a bout of the flu to drive across the Bay Bridge at rush hour in order
to clean my cat box should be pleasure enough.
I never, ever
bottom. I was just telling you I did because switching is so
fashionable these days. Everybody knows that a real dominant never
wants to let someone else be in control, or to feel pain. If I ever
felt the slightest desire of that nature, I would immediately give up
domination, since I would obviously be unworthy to hold a whip.
SM is not the least bit sexual to me. I am dominant because that is my
true nature, and I cannot be anything else. Expressing that nature is
my only desire, and I would not dream of cheapening it with sexual
interaction, or of losing control by becoming sexually aroused or --
heaven forbid -- having an orgasm. Sexual arousal would lessen my
power and get in the way of my true dominance.
I love wearing
fetish clothing, especially very, very high heels. All dominant women
do. Teetering around in agony makes us feel powerful. We only pretend
it doesn't because we don't like giving you what you want.
me a special thrill deep down inside when some yutz I've never met
addresses me as "Mistress" or throws himself to his knees at my
feet. He is obviously a very special person who is perceptive enough
to recognize my true nature. I don't understand why everybody doesn't
do the same.
I've never quite understood the concept of "consent."
A dominant is a dominant; it is not in us to seek consent. If I can do
something, and it pleases me to do it, I should do it. To withhold my
desires because some silly person thinks he doesn't want to conform to
them is to deny my true nature.
I never bother to negotiate, and I
never give my partners safewords. My true dominant nature enables me
to ascertain when I may be doing damage. Not that I care, of course;
the privilege of my attention is certainly worth a few physical or
emotional scars, and there are always more submissives available to
someone like me.
So I hope this relieves my readers' minds, and
returns them safely to the fantasy world that I was pretending to try
to yank them out of. Be sure to read this column next month, when I'll
tell you more. I'll also fill you in on my Nobel Prize, my Vogue cover
modeling session, and my Swiss bank account.
Lady Green is hard at work on her upcoming books The Compleat Spanker
and (with Dossie Easton, as Catherine A. Liszt) The Ethical Slut. Her
company, Greenery Press, publishes these and many other books on
introductory and advanced SM and related sexualities. For more
information, send a self-addressed stamped envelope to 3739 Balboa
Ave. #195, San Francisco, CA 94121, or e-mail her at email@example.com.
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Last updated: 30 September 1996